Summer Rain

On a hot June day

I sat on the pier

My legs dangling

Not unlike the participle

So misplaced by the news anchor in her story of the missing person

Poor woman whose remains were found

She suffered one last indignity

A victim of bad grammer

And here I sit in the middle of an early summer heatwave

Thinking about you

And waiting for my next period

To end the next run on sentence

Of misplaced love

Which you said was never only about sex or that’s what you told me

That last night in your arms

And I cried inside

Not where you could see me

I wasn’t raised that way

You poured us a drink and said you were going on tour

I wrote two songs that day because you asked me

I had misgivings probably because the new soloist was singing my songs and sharing your bed

Where is the pragmatism in that

A coyote was spotted in the city the news anchor said, her eyes glistening

And there was your image on a website offering tickets to your next concert

I closed my laptop and left the pier when it started to rain

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Do You Know

Why do people say “Later”

When they know they will never see you again

I wrote another song yesterday

It was about you again

You’ll never read the words

You don’t even like my music

Do you know what I did today

Do you know what I made for breakfast

Do you know my heart

I thought I heard a red bird’s song in the tree outside my window

Maybe it was a cardinal

I don’t know

But it’s song was pretty

Do you know that I think about you

Do you know what I know

What a silly question

Do you know my thoughts

Do you know my feelings

Do you know my regrets

Do you know my heart?

©Cate Derham

The Undefined Girl

I walked along

The railroad tracks

Of a long deserted town

Did you think about me

Smoking a cig

Sitting on the damp sod

Writing a song

I didn’t write about you

A far off train whistle

Was a more dulcet tone

Than any I’d written

The day you left

I didn’t cry … or eat

A cardinal sat in the tree

But didn’t sing

I started to text you

It rained, probably due

To my mood

I wished for a rainbow

It was spring

For an instant and then

Autumn again

The cardinal saw me but

Didn’t care

He had other things on his mind

Funny how that works

I couldn’t tell you what I felt

Defining my feelings

Is my deepest fear

That night you held me

Telling me you understood

Made me tremble

I even half-believed you

I wanted to believe

Did I ever tell you

I believed in religion

In Heaven and Hell

Because I needed definition

I will always love you

Probably

Places

I am a wayfarer

A wanderer

Though I never leave this spot

In the sand

My favorite place

Is this corner of

The Musée d’Orsay

I never leave

The sun is in my rear view mirror

The sea is behind me

I find a cloud and follow it

Can we pretend you haven’t left

Your lips are so close to mine

I hold the salt air on my tongue

As our breath mingles

And our lips almost meet

But you smile and say not yet

Not yet?

You pour the wine

And say all the right things

I look down and say

I have to find a place

In the sand